Its not always about the weight of the bullet itself. Its how its constructed. Sometimes a light varmint weight copper jacket can be over-rotated from the high rate of twist in some AR barrels. More than the twist can effect this though even though it has the length and weight that correlates with the rate of twist of a particular rifle.
The smoothness of the interior of the barrel, the bullet jacket thickness also play a part in this scenario.
There's no magic list that tells you what bullets may come apart in a given rifle.
I was shooting my 1in8 twist Armalite in the NYS Highpower Leg Match at Camp Smith a while back and I had 75gr A-Max's come apart like you describe on the 600 yard line which cost me some valuable points. I switched to Sierra 80gr Match Kings and never looked back.
The Hornady A-Max is a match bullet, but its built like a varmint bullet with a very thin copper jacket.
The Sierra is a little tougher and would have to be pushed much harder than a 223 is capable of to repeat this event.
In the short answer, you'll have to see for yourself. The indicator is that when you fire a round, its followed by a second audible pop ahead of the barrel. The second sign is a missed target...
Hope this makes it more clear for you.